Tantrums and How to Deal With Them

I recently reread this article on tantrums and thought I’d share the love.

Here’s the basic gist:

WHY DO KIDS HAVE TANTRUMS?
Little ones don’t yet know how to receive or control their emotions. But, remember that, up until the age of about two, they likely always got what they wanted as they were totally dependent on their parents. Their world shifts when parents start denying them things. This causes them to lash out, test their parents, and put on a performance in an attempt to get what they want.

HELP FOR PARENTS:

  • Understand your child’s emotional limitations and don’t expect him or her to react in a mature way.
  • Stay calm, even trying to ignore the tantrum as far as possible. Any kind of reaction is the attention that fuels the tantrum.
  • Hold your ground and be consistent. Don’t let them think that the tantrum achieves the desired result.
  • Be patient. It is going to be a process to avoid tantrums, but it is necessary and rewarding.

IN PRACTICE:

  • As the tantrum begins, hold your child lovingly and restrict him from thrashing about.
  • Don’t shout or threaten, just allow the child to realise that the tantrum achieved nothing.
  • Have a time-out area for tantrums and only allow him out of there once he has calmed down.
  • Don’t you love that public tantrum? The one that makes those pre-parents look at you with judgement as they languorously sip their skinny chai lattes? In these cases, take your child out of the view of others, and then follow the same course as above.

I’d love to hear from parents battling with tantrums – hope this helps!

 

Pic credit: Dreamstime
Pic credit: Dreamstime
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2 thoughts on “Tantrums and How to Deal With Them

  1. So much truth there. I have a black belt in tantrum survival. Or is it an immunity pin? But I’m not sure if I’m ready to talk about it much yet. *still too emotional* *tears prickle eyes* Great article tho. Do all that plus wine.

    Like

  2. Well, with a 3.5 year old I’m slap bang in the middle of the tantrum phase.
    I think it’s best to remain as calm as possible. Sometimes I’d find myself screaming and shouting, but that only makes the situation worse. Depending on what is happening, sometimes it helps to drop everything and just hug your child and say I love you. Sienna will usually burst out in tears and tell me the real problem.
    Those public tantrums are the. absolute. worst! Oh my goodness, I cringe just thinking of them!

    Like

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